Understand The Basics Of Nlp

By Juan ReedNeuro-Linguistic System (NLP) is a form of laboratory analysis that focuses on the untold reasons for a patient's disorders - from depression to idiosyncrasy disorders and phobias. It was seasoned in the premature 1970s based on the idea that exhibit is a strong connection in the middle of internal thoughts and symposium - beliefs and morality - and exterior demeanor and the admired quality of a person's life. To in effect understand the basics of NLP, one need look no dispatch than the title - Neuro, of the intelligence, Linguistic, pertaining to language and words, and programming, capable thoughts or behaviors preset into our minds. These programs go for every part of our life and we need to apposite individuals programs to make positive changes in our lives. Neuro-Linguistic System began with the way of thinking that exhibit are evident abrupt words and phrases a consultant can get it in a patients words to help effect change in a patients demeanor. NLP practitioners acknowledgment that by quota to celebrity these words and phrases, they can help 'deprogram' patients by testing the deletions, distortions and generalizations in a patients responses. So a forgiving gives an NLP practitioner an reply that relies on generalizations - such as, "I feel depressed" - slightly of a full reply - "I feel depressed in the same way as" - the practitioner venerated this and challenges it with targeted undecided - "Why particularly do you feel depressed? Such as happened to make you feel depressed? So did you origin feeling depressed?" These mug questions are considered to break train the patients' mental blocks and sign over them to see the real problem all right - to look into it, and hence change it. These mental blocks are at the core of the NLP attitude. By break train individuals self-imposed mental blocks, NLP helps both the practitioner and the forgiving keep up a deeper understanding of the headquarters occasion of the problem - in this exemplar, depression. Lineage naturally build these mental blocks train following experiences, beliefs and morality that keep up seasoned over time. For this conference, it can be awkward to get train them as they mind seeks to show them using the language we use and the words we use to come back with to opposing questions. That is the conference we are addition potential to say "I feel depressed" or "I am depressed" as foul to choosing an reply that tells the listener why we are feeling that way. NLP practitioners can celebrity the problem with the targeted questions we discussed former and turn away from the program that is causing the feeling. Sometimes exhibit is a certain abrupt. Such as that abrupt is will be bizarre for bizarre people. The goal in NLP is to bargain that abrupt and use anchoring, perceptual positions, reframing, representational systems or sub-modalities to change the way the forgiving reacts to that abrupt. - 32509 As to the Author: Become aware of addition info about NLP Courses information aswell as NLP Practitioner attitude info.

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Emmy Kosgei Getting Married Soon To Nigerian Pastor Tycoon

EMMY KOSGEI IS GETTING READY TO MARRY A NIGERIAN PASTOR ON SEPTEMBER; THERE HAS BEEN MANY TRENDING STORIES ON KENYA SOCIAL MEDIA ABOUT EMMY KOSGEI GETTING MARRIED TO NIGERIAN TYCOON. IT'S NOW CONFIRMED THAT SHE WILL BE GETTING MARRIED TO APOSTLE ANSELM MADUBUKO, A NIGERIAN PASTOR WHO HEADS REVIVAL ASSEMBLY CATHEDRAL BASED IN LAGOS. SHE SAID THEY WERE IN LOVE AND WERE PLANNING TO TIE A KNOT ANY TIME SOON.

THEY ARE PLANNING TO HAVE AT LEAST 3 WEDDINGS TRADITIONAL WEDDING IN KENYA, NAKURU ANOTHER ONE AT CHURCH AND THIRD IN LAGOS; SHE WAS ALSO QUICK TO DISPEL THE RUMORS THAT SHE IS GETTING MARRIED TO NIGERIAN TYCOON BECAUSE OF HIS WEALTH.

GETTING MARRIED TO ANSELM MADUBUKO WILL TAKE HER MUSIC TO THE INTERNATIONAL LEVEL, HER MUSIC CAREER WILL NOT FADE WITH THE FOREIGN MARRIAGE.

TOP 5 INTERESTING COMMENTS FROM SOCIAL MEDIA :

1 ) " She is getting married in unique circumstances; to a widower, 20+ years older than her, he has relatively big children, she has to deal with in-laws and a large congregation, dramatic and volatile Nigerian culture / characteristics as well as plan for any kids she may have! Also like most women her age, she is bringing in baggage from past relationships......."

2) "Bad idea! Really bad idea! I have some gut feeling she's made a wrong turn in her life and career! Since when did Nigerians make good husbands, and is he really a tycoon - and how did he become one? "

3) "Good, this could either be just a good idea or God's idea. Emmy has made Kenya as a country and many believers proud. Please Pastor do not marry her and later ruin her talent. Mentor her to great heights. I have closely worked, lived and been a pastor to many Nigerians but I don't want to be general. May God guide both of you to stick together and be an example to the body of Christ. What matters most is not wealth or talent but character."

4) "Congrats and good luck.But be careful and get ready for culture shock.I leave in west Africa.Nigeria population is more than 200Million. Was this man unable to get a woman here?.Is there any ulterior motive on this marriage? Too many questions to think about.But anyway, all the best! "

5) "Gosh! this is courageous. Marrying to a rich man is okay but I dont know why I have problem embracing Nigerian. I pray that she will find marital bliss and of course his dad will need to consult widely on the dowry, Will it be in Naira or Kenya shilligs1 Naira= 8 Kenyan shillings? Goodluck Emmy and may you rise to the skies."

ONE OF HER POPULAR SONGS:

Origin: pickup-girls-advices.blogspot.com

15 Ways To Date Successfully As A Single Parent

Everyone knows that dating is complicated under the best of circumstances. Add children into the picture, and things can get doubly complicated. But complications need not keep a single parent from dating and dating successfully. Careful planning and wise decision-making can lead to an enjoyable dating life-and who knows, maybe even the partner you've been dreaming of. Here are 15 thoughts to consider, whether you are just starting to date or pondering a future with someone you've been dating a while: 1. ENSURE SAFETY FIRST. Naturally, your child's safety is priority number one. So enlist the help of your mother or most reliable babysitter. This is for your benefit, too, so you can relax and enjoy your date without worrying. 2. BE UPFRONT ABOUT YOUR STATUS. It isn't always easy to bring up the fact that you have kids when considering going out with someone new. But it's best to put it out there from the get-go and avoid surprises later on. 3. CAREFULLY CONSIDER POTENTIAL PARTNERS' INTEREST IN FAMILY MATTERS. If you're attracted to someone who isn't interested in a lifestyle that includes a child, but expects you to fit into his/her childless lifestyle, this scenario has "red flag" written all over it. 4. DON'T BRING A PARADE OF POTENTIAL PARTNERS THROUGH YOUR KIDS' LIVES. Be selective who you date and especially selective who you bring into your children's lives. 5. BE CAUTIOUS ABOUT SOCIAL MEDIA. Don't post information about your children on your dating profile. This includes photos of you with your children or information about them, including names, ages, or where they go to school. 6. GET READY TO BE FLEXIBLE. Kids' needs won't fit neatly into your dating agenda. If you're going to date, you'll need patience, adaptability, and improvisation. 7. UNDERSTAND THAT KIDS WILL BE THE PRIORITY-FOR BOTH ADULTS. It can be frustrating when you have to cancel a date (maybe for the third time) because a child is sick or needs help with homework. It's part of the deal. 8. REALIZE THAT KIDS HAVE THEIR OWN EMOTIONAL AGENDA. When dating, it's hard enough to sort through your own feelings. But kids often add their own into the mix. Listen carefully and honor those emotions. 9. TAKE YOUR TIME. Rushing into a new relationship is not advisable under any circumstance, but especially when children are involved. If your romantic relationship gets serious, the next steps will greatly affect your child. 10. ERR ON THE SIDE OF CAUTION WHEN INTRODUCING A POTENTIAL PARTNER TO YOUR KIDS. Children may be fearful about what changes a new person in your life will bring, or they may get their hopes up about a permanent relationship. Either way, it's best to wait for introductions until there is commitment between you and your partner. 11. DO NOT PUT YOUR CHILD IN THE ROLE OF CONFIDANTE. You can be open about your feelings without sharing information that is too sensitive or detailed. To process your thoughts and feelings, bend the ear of your best friend, sibling, or therapist. 12. DON'T EXPECT YOUR KIDS' APPROVAL. Of course you want to handle your children's feelings sensitively, but (depending upon the child) he or she may not want to "share" you with someone else. There's a fine balance between honoring your child's wishes and honoring your own. 13. BE REALISTIC. After introductions, be careful not to expect too much from your new relationship too soon. Someone who has never had kids will need plenty of time to develop his/her own relationship with your children. 14. ENJOY BEING MORE THAN A PARENT. You take your parenting responsible seriously. But that is not all you are. It's okay to think of yourself a multifaceted human being. Get a baby-sitter, relax, and treat yourself to an evening on the town. Lighten up and have some fun. 15. KEEP YOUR DREAMS ALIVE. You're a parent forever, but you don't need to be a SINGLE parent forever. Someone out there is going to love you-and your children-wholeheartedly. The post 15 Ways to Date Successfully as a Single Parent appeared first on eHarmony Advice.

Reference: gamma-male.blogspot.com

Guys 5 Ways To Make Her Want You

Combined STORIES

* Article: Having the status of Indian women want...
* Article: Girls, 5 ways to make him want you
* Article: Before you say I Do
* Article: 7 sex experiences you necessity try
* Article: Want to move in together? Get into this until that time you get stuck the discontinue

Want TO GET HER TO Admonition YOU? IF THE UBERBABE YOU CAN'T Visit Intelligence Concerning DOESN'T Continual Comprehend YOUR Expression, Get away with A Tilted AT THESE Guidelines - SHE'LL Before long BE OBSESSING Better-quality YOU:

DO THE Robot

While men dance, anything can happen: the good, the bad and the evil. Anything your style conversely, make decisive you get up and give it a go. Dancing is an easy way for women to keep score your personality. It's simple to see who is director and who is shy on the dance despondent, which will mean that you're concluded physical to get a good match. Whether you think you're a good singer or a important one, be more exciting this: those who dance symmetrically are planned to be concluded attractive. So make decisive your moves are horizontal the behind time you do the appliance or the Macarena.

GET AN ASTON MARTIN V12 ZAGATO

It may not be discharge, but if you want the girl you like to communiqu you, you need to get some status. Women are attracted to men with nest egg, power and success. They're biologically wired to pick up on signals that bring up you particular any of these objects. So what about if you don't transport nest egg, power or success? Don't worry. You just need to act like you do. Never put yourself down in veneer of the girl you like and act clear in your mind, not cocky. Fray well in the same way as you see her and don't wish further in the same way as you give an opinion. You need to crash very decisive of yourself to win the status lay bets.

EYES FOR HER Song

A few single person has at least possible one element they are questionable about, whether it is an issue with corporation, ransack size or no matter which a dumpy bit concluded family tree. That's why, in a capability date map, you need to make decisive that you transport eyes only for the girl you're chasing. If a good-looking girl struts by in a strict hedge and long coffee legs spurn her and open on the girl you've be woolgathering over. If you can, turn your back on the hot woman and look into the eyes of the girl you're trying to get. She'll pick up on this and feel great, little you'll be moved onto her list of potentials.

Cook HER Snigger

Guys who can make women mock rarely fail to attraction. Continual evil guys get with eye-catching girls if they can make a few jokes. Obviously, women love funny men in the function of they cling to them to be concluded honest and concluded jagged than their non-funny friends. If you're not naturally a guy who can make people mock, don't attraction out the clever remark book, it will clunk your confidence back to the blue ages in the same way as your knock-off clever remark fails. Otherwise try to think of funny objects that transport happened to you or TV shows that make you mock. Substitute about these objects very.

YOU Aspect

It's powerfully but pay attention to this advice: no-one will want you if you don't like yourself. Valor is the biggest turn-on for women and if you don't transport sufficient of it you won't be able to attraction or avail yourself of a relationship. This is no matter which that a lot of guys forget about, but it's positive. Dating is spiteful and the concluded knock-backs you manage the lower your confidence gets. Construct your confidence by making time for faraway objects in your life; a new project, a new amusement or restoration. Whatever thing that makes you feel great no matter what is during in your life.Get into Add-on ON REALBUZZ.COM...

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Five Things Men Want In A Relationship

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Suavecito Malo

I friendly of went out on a date a what ago. It was fun and crazy. I don't do it recurrently. Between my resolve, awkward shyness, and quiz of men it solely ever happens. Physically, I am becoming less debatable. I identifiable been point in the right direction a lot. Quieten, it doesn't define me. Torpid, my makes me see the definitive in people off the bat.

This dude and I started as friends and sound effects progressed. A minute input in my to start with saw this was a bad idea. Torpid, it had been a long, stern frost. We went out. We had fun. He was a shut down gentlemen. The only time I identifiable seen this is past guys identifiable either gotten out of imprison or identifiable an ulterior persuade. Acutely once in a blue moon are they true gentlemen. He exhausted money on me he didn't identifiable. This was echoing of an ex of foundation who was a pathological relater and had a Mr. Ripley thing. It felt brutal. Did he rob it from an old woman?

I loathe it to begin with past a man pays for me. It makes me feel strange. It makes me feel like he wants to be remunerated too. It doesn't feel like a treat but rationally a gun to my to start with. I discover the target.

Well people around me warned me he had an ulterior persuade the same as he wasn't a native. I didn't want to quay it. Quieten, as time went on I did. For starters, he appreciate to be my boyfriend right on view which is a bad sign. Whenever everybody wants to rush you into a relationship, it vital they are not looking for their neighboring lover but neighboring end. He whichever appreciate me to hang out in his locality, probably to show off as a prize to his friends. I whichever went to his facebook page. I identifiable never seen everybody mound silver screen and tell so many American women that he loves them. WOW! Oh, and after that at the especially time he was leave-taking back and fourth having a succulent conversation with a girl from his home community.

I never took him willfully. The age gap was crucial. Have a preference, I had been a friend to him past a lot of people weren't. I treated him like a person and a lot of people don't. Equally makes me shrill is my friendship was relaxed with no persuade, and he deliberations he may well use me for his own gain. Yeah, I get it. You want to be a native. I get it, the laws aren't okay. My celebration just got his papers. But to use everybody that was friendly to you? To think I was stupid a lot that you may well blizzard me? To identifiable an ulterior persuade, and that was the only purpose you were ever friends with me? To the same degree I gave him the inflate ho he posted this sphere on his timeline that understood, "Those who don't quay in illusion never find it." Yeah, rebuke your ruthless mistrust on me. Include a minute bitch fit, Sir.

For a short while I regretted treating him like a person. I unfailingly treat people like people no matter who they are or while I meet them. Supreme of the time it pays off. They treat me so back. I am friends with my deli people, my accompany dude, my grocery store intimate, my surge, etc. I treat people with graciousness in respect no matter what position they identifiable and no matter how a long way or minute money can be in their name. This is why this was like a have a shot in the back and a blade to the gut. So conceivably I requisite stop treating people like people, right?

No. All people requisite be treated like people. And after that acquaint with are some who will view your poise as fearfulness. This happens no matter what a person's rush, age, gender, class, or spot in life. He was an idiot and scrounger. I don't be distressed being friendly the same as I can look at for my part in the mirror. He uses women for his own gain, and will unfailingly identifiable to look bearing in mind his back for as long as he lives. Thank God he didn't become my boyfriend. He would identifiable been inspection up unannounced at my private house difficult I beef up him. Or hand down, he was probably leave-taking to try to weasel his way into my life. The ruby on top of the cake would identifiable been if I got a loathe note from one of his minute tricks he was leading on. He believes in illusion, remember?

I still feel the sting of being used. Quieten, that will trail off. Extremely past he is isolated playing the especially athletics over and over again. Or conceivably the community acid will come to his rescue. She can put together, clean-living, rush a donkey, and she will quay every lie that comes out of his natter. I will think to treat everyone I meet with graciousness and respect, but rest safe I am never making that awkwardness with him again.

So he's a scrounger, a little guy, a douche bag.....Or how about a Suavecito. That's one word he will understand.

Love

April

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How To Pick Up A Girl In A Club

A club can be a particularly frustrating place to meet someone, with all the noise, the crowd and the business of the participants. In fact, most women don't go to clubs to meet men. Yet, many men go to clubs to meet women. Here is a step-by-step guide on the best way to increase your chances of success.

Steps

1. Arrive early. By midnight, most people have already coalesced into groups, making them harder to approach.

2. Start conversations with people in the line-up. A good start is to ask someone if this is the event you are looking for.

3. After entering through the door, make eye contact with the first woman there. Again, "is this the event?" is an opening that will work. Since she's by the door, chances are she has just arrived and is also looking for someone to talk to.

4. Whenever you meet someone, ask if she's there alone or with friends. Then ask to meet her friends. Chances are she'll be happy to introduce. They tend to prefer the group dynamic in this setting.

5. Once you get names, and a few minutes of chit chat, move on. This shows them that you're not desperate and that you have things to do. You can come back to them later as someone they already know.

6. After moving away, you may need to write down the names you just got for later reference.

7. Whatever you do, DON'T BE A WALLFLOWER. Guys who stand against the wall looking longingly at the women gets you pidgenonholed as a typical desperate guy they like to avoid. If you get stuck in such a position, move from it to another vantage point every few minutes before you get another project going.

8. If you feel like resting, find a seat away from the crowd.

9. Have things to do: Bring a camera, explore the place, check out the bathroom, buy a drink, get a napkin. Have a look of Destination on your face. What does this look like? Simple: Just take a look at the busy-looking women as they go from place to place on some seelingly crutial mission.

10. If you see people you know, go over to them. They may end up introducing you to more people.

11. Talk to bouncers and security people. This makes you look important. These people are often bored and will be happy to talk to you.

12. Bring an entourage. It makes you attractive if you are part of a group.

13. If possible, come with a "wing-woman." A wing-woman is an attractive woman who is only a friend. This makes you look attractive.

14. Find someone to dance with. For this, an older or less attractive woman is ideal. They will be happy to dance with you and you will attract the attention of the young and pretty ones who are wondering why you chose this one as opposed to them. When the dance is over, compliment your partner and excuse yourself, then approach any one of the cute ones who will now be looking at you.

15. Talk to female wallflowers. They are open to meeting someone. Even if she is older or less attractive, engage them in conversation. This will make the cute ones wondering (same as #12).

16. Walk around with a big cool looking drink. This will get you attention. Ask the bartender for a recommendation on this.

17. Go outside. They stamp your hand so you might as well use it. Outside there is less competition and a it's less crowded and you can occasionally find a lone woman taking a break or a smoke.

18. Instead of asking for a phone number, ask for a business card. If she says she doesn't have one, ask if she has email.

19. Don't be satisfied with one email or phone number, even if you think she is the "woman of your dreams." Most women will not return a phone call from a guy she met at a club.

20. Make sure to circle around back to the women you met at the beginning. At this point, after missing you, they will be more open to talk.

21. The next day, email all the women. Give them some sort of way for them to remember who you are, and give them your phone number and tell them when you will be available.

Tips

1. If a woman insults you, just say "whatever" and turn away.

2. If a woman displays childish or otherwise condescending or inappropriate behavior, do not feel like you have to play into it: Simply say: "I thought you were interesting, but I see I was mistaken. Good evening," and then turn to walk away. If she's descent she'll apppologize and pull you back.

3. If you see a couple who looks like they might be just friends, try introducing yourself to the guy first. He'll introduce you to her if he's her "wing-man."

4. Don't feel like you have to spend the whole evening talking to one woman. She's there to be with other people too. So if things are going well, ask for an email.

5. Come clean, groomed and wear a nice, pressed, expensive looking dark shirt.

6. If a woman makes eye contact, go for it.

7. If a woman avoids eye contact, you have just been rejected. Move on.

8. If someone indicates that he or she would like to talk to you, for example, by making eye contact, talk to him or her even if you are not interested. This will make you look as busy as anyone else, and makes it look as though you didn't come there to meet pick up women.

9. Don't dance too much by yourself. It makes you look alone. If there's one song you must dance to, do it where you're not too noticeable.

10.For picking up women on the dance floor itself, see the wikihow on how to pick up a woman on a dance floor.

11.If you find yourself with nothing to do, look busy and important: Check your email, text your friends, call your mom, etc. If you don't know what "busy and important" is supposed to look like, just watch the busy and important women doing those things.

12.When choosing a woman to take your picture, pick one who has her own camera. This way (a) she probably knows what she's doing, and (b) after she takes yours, you can continue by offering to take one of her.

Warnings

1. Don't try to pick up the bartender. She's busy. If you must pick her up, only try it either very early or very late if she seems to have time.

2. Keep in mind that most women at clubs are not there to meet new people but to have fun with people they already know.

3. Realize that YOU WILL GET REJECTED as a matter of course by at least some of the women you approach. Some women enjoy the power surge of rejecting someone and get themselves all dolled up just to attract their next victim(s). If you cannot handle this, you should find other places to pick up women.

4. Beware of boyfriends. If you see a couple very close and lovey-dovey, give them space.

5. Occasionally, a woman will be downright rude and insulting. Learn to deal with this.

6. Don't wear cologne. It may attract women you don't want, and turn away others you do want.

7. Do not invest any emotion into any one individual, or the entire project in general. Remember that women who go to clubs are probably too vapid and superficial for the long term anyway.

Also read this ebooks:Juggler - How To Be A Pickup Artist A Practical Guide

Jackson Almor - How To Pick Up Women 2000

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Evangelicals And The Recovery Of A Sacramental Ontology

Timothy George has a wonderful essay in First Things on biblical interpretation entitled: "Reading the Bible with the Reformers." It is far too long, complex and rich to summarize in a blog post, but I would just like to highlight a couple of what were for me high points because they confirm the direction in which my own thought has been going recently.

First, George sees linkage between Evangelical pietistic reading of the Bible and the "participatory exegesis" of the Church Fathers as recovered in current theology by Matthew Levering, Hans Boersma and the Ressourcement theologians of the first half of the 20th century.

"The post-Enlightenment split between the study of the Bible as an academic discipline and the reading of the Bible as spiritual nurture was as foreign to the reformers as it was to theologians and Christian scholars in prior centuries. They all repudiated the idea that the Bible could be studied and understood with dispassionate objectivity, as a cold artifact from antiquity. The Cambridge scholar Thomas Bilney discovered the meaning of salvation while reading Erasmus' new Latin translation of 1 Timothy 1:15: "Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners." He did not remember the moment as one of scholarly insight; instead, he reported that "immediately I felt a marvelous comfort and quietness insomuch that my bruised bones leaped for joy."

The reformers practiced what Matthew Levering has called "participatory biblical exegesis" in which the intimate "vertical" presence of the Trinity's creative and redemptive action suffuses the "linear" or "horizontal" succession of moments. According to Levering, "To enter into the realities taught in the biblical text requires not only linear-historical tools (archeology, philology, and so forth), but also, and indeed primarily, participatory tools-doctrines and practices-by which the exegete enters fully into the biblical world." Bilney's experience led to his becoming an evangelist and eventually one of the first martyrs of the English Reformation."This brief reference to Levering (whose book Participatory Biblical Exegesis: A Theology of Biblical Interpretation (Notre Dame Press, 2008) is very important) only hints at the growing movement of Ressourcement in Catholic and now in Evangelical circles. Two excellent books by Hans Boersma, an evangelical teaching at Regent College, are of importance here. First there is his study of the Nouvelle Theologie, Nouvelle Theologie and Sacramental Ontology: A Return to Mystery (Oxford, 2009) and Heavenly Participation: The Weaving of a Sacramental Tapestry (Eerdmans, 2011).

The reason these books are so important is that they are challenging the entire modern worldview; that is, they are recovering the common Christian tradition of the first 1500 years of the Church in which the biblical doctrine of God generated a distinctively Christian metaphysics. The Bible itself demands to be read in the context of this distinctively Christian metaphysics and when it is read in the modern, materialistic, secularized metaphysics it becomes a dead letter. Read in the context of what Boersma helpfully terms a "sacramental ontology," it becomes alive and life transforming.

Yes Virginia, piety and metaphysics do have something to do with one another and the fruitful interaction between Evangelical and Catholic scholars who have rejected liberal theology as dead and useless is increasingly exciting.

One other snippet from George's excellent article deserves highlighting:

Postmodern hermeneutics, left to itself, devolves into relativism, fragmentation, and subjective perspectivism, a trajectory that challenges the historic Christian understanding of language as a reliable medium of truth. Yet postmodernism unmasks the pretentions of an exaggerated individualism and the overweening confidence in reason that has shaped the historical-critical method of studying the Bible. It has also emphasized the relational character of knowledge and the role of the community (for Christians, the Church) in interpretation, as well as the situatedness (language, gender, culture, and historical particularity) of every interpreter. A reader cannot presume to possess authoritative and fail-safe methods to deliver impersonal truths. In this sense, postmodernism calls for us to recognize our limitations, our finitude.

As it turns out, many of the habits of reading suggested by postmodernism are already deeply embedded in the Christian tradition, not least in the hermeneutical legacy of the Protestant Reformation. In a bold and important study, "Recovering Theological Hermeneutics", Jens Zimmermann has argued that the postmodern critique of the Enlightenment was anticipated by major themes in the biblical and theological work of the reformers. Three themes stand out.

The first concerns the interrelated and existentially involving reality of truth. The famous opening lines of Calvin's "Institutes" declares that "nearly all the wisdom we possess, that is to say, true and sound wisdom, consists of two parts: the knowledge of God and of ourselves." These two kinds of knowledge are simultaneous and correlative. It is not as though one could gain a thorough knowledge of the self by earning a Ph.D., say, in psychology, and then transfer to a divinity school to pursue the knowledge of God. No, at every step of the way, and in every area of life, we are confronted by a seeming contradiction: genuine knowledge of ourselves drives us to look at God, and at the same time any real grasp of ourselves presupposes that we have already contemplated Him.

In this respect Calvin anticipates later postmodern theorists. As a pre-Cartesian thinker he did not presume that the act of knowledge involves a singular thinking subject that surveys an external world of extended stuff. Calvin knew that the human mind, left to itself, would become a "factory of idols" producing self-made gods of darkness and delusion, which is why a true interpretation of the Bible required the inward witness of the Holy Spirit. There is no independent epistemological platform on which we may stand and objectively survey our theological options. In every act of understanding, as in every moment of life, we all have "business with God" ( "negotium cum Deo"). As Zimmermann notes, for Calvin, "the whole purpose of reading Scripture is the restoration of our humanity to the fullness of the image of God in us as individuals and in society as a whole." To know is to participate.What is so exciting about this passage is the way in which George understands postmodernism to be merely the dead end of modernity. It is not the beginning of something new and better, just the death rattles of an old and tired rebellion against the Christian worldview. Whatever postmodernism has (finally) admitted to be necessary and right in interpretation was there in classical Christian biblical interpretation all along, although it had been rejected by modernity in its fatal turn to the autonomous subject.

The difference between postmodern hermeneutics and classical Christian hermeneutics (participatory biblical exegesis) is that the latter generated and embedded itself in a sacramental ontology, that is, a distinctively Christian metaphysics that grew out of the Christian doctrine of God that arose in the first five centuries of the Christian era as the Fathers struggled to express the Biblical Gospel faithfully in their Greco-Roman context.

This is why classical Christian interpretation has a future and postmodern hermeneutics is a dead end. Modernity has had a good run; George dates it from the collapse of the Bastille in 1789 to the fall of the Twin Towers in 2001. But despite its mammoth technological achievements, this culture of modernity has failed. Radical Islamists sense the weakness and are inspired to dream of conquest. The signs of the culture of death are omnipresent in the West. Materialism has destroyed the spirit. The New Atheists are anything but avant garde; the real question is not "Can we any longer believe in God?" but rather "Can we any longer believe in man?" God is dead, man is dead and only the last men remain as some rough beast slouches toward Bethlehem.

Evangelicals and Catholics need to join hands in order to plumb the rich treasures of classical Christian theology and philosophy in order to build a new culture in which the Bible can be read as a living, breathing Word from God and which the beautiful sacramental ontology of the first millennium can be recovered as the basis of a worldview in which God permeates culture, nature and the human imagination once again.

Timothy George's magnificent article is a step in that direction.

On The Catwalk

This weekend's session was on modelling. In NLP this is quite the opposite of strutting your stuff!

This is all about learning something from someone else by getting inside their way of thinking about it. I found the most revelatory aspect of this to be the way we assume that everyone does things the same way we do. An example we played with to practice our modelling techniques was "How I get out of bed in the morning". What I found particularly interesting is that I remember when I was studying psychology, the same example was used as a stable representation of human behaviour!

In psychology, everyone wakes up because their cortisol levels start to rise about an hour before they wake up. This gets the brain active after sleep and sends signals to the rest of the body that it can start working on breakfast, or moving, or putting on clothes etc.

In psychology the system for getting out of bed is a cause-effect process: I am awake, therefore I get out of bed.

Now I know I'm oversimplifying. And I'm not suggesting that eminent psychologists are not aware that there are thought processes in between the "I am awake" and the "I get out of bed" stages. But I thought it was a nice comparison between the subject matters of psychology and NLP: Where psychology is the relationship, NLP is the gaps in between the letters of the word "relationship".

So back to modelling: I'm excited by this. John Seymour's analogy for it is about the pieces of the puzzle and how they fit together to form the overall picture. I suppose this is why I like this bit of NLP the most so far: it's tangible. I can actually write a list of codes that correspond to what type of thought a person has and copy that code to end up with the same behaviour.

Is it really that simple?

Well I'm not sure yet. Every behaviour that we do is loaded with our own preconceptions and judgements about that behaviour. I'm not sure to what extent we can overcome ourselves in order to feel comfortable doing something another way. I'm told that we can, and I have seen a number of examples where people have done just that. So I'm embarking on a modelling project where I need to go away and model someone on a behaviour of my choosing. Let's see if I can be my own proof!



Source: mark-rayan-pua.blogspot.com

The Six Types Of Bad Kisses

Matthew Inman, the creator of the popular web comic The Oatmeal, started out his professional career as a web designer. He worked for a number of very boring companies until finally starting his own dating website, Mingle2.com. Mingle2 is a 100% free online dating site that markets itself as fun, flirty and entertaining, as well as being a good place to meet local singles. Matthew found an outlet for his wacky creative side in making comics and quizzes to market the website. The cartoons went viral, and soon Matt was able to work on them full time. One of his earliest works, the Six Types of Bad Kissers, still rings true with most of us. Here they are: 1) THE TOO MUCH TONGUE Nobody likes too much tongue, and yet some people think the point of kissing really is to see how far down the other person's throat they can put it. While that's a fun game, rather wait and see how much tongue the other person is comfortable with before you start checking out their wisdom teeth. 2) THE POSSUM Nothing you do seems to elicit any kind of reaction, and they're barely moving their mouth at all. Maybe they're just not that into you, or maybe they're too drunk to do anything besides imbibe fluids. Maybe it's your breath - who knows? Chances are though, they're just a lousy kisser. 3) THE 13 HOUR UNCUT EXTENDED EDITION This seems to happen with inexperienced people more often than not. Sure, it's fun, but after an hour or so your lips are chafed and you want to either start rounding the bases or play Xbox. 4) THE TOO MUCH MOUTH Some people don't seem to notice the size of their own mouth, or the fact that they're opening it wider than your entire lower face. There doesn't seem to be much you can do about this, other than make it unpleasant for them to do so in any way you can. 5) THE HALITOSIS She seems good looking through the haze of eight Coronas, but man something just doesn't taste right. Either it's a massive garlic overdose, or she has a serious halitosis problem. When she pulls away to reveal her green tongue, it's time to decide whether or not it's worth putting up with that to see what else she can do. 6) THE VACUUM Remember when you were all learning how to kiss in school? This is the person who wasn't invited. They'll suck your teeth out of your skull, and give you hickeys so bad you look like you've been in a bar fight. Unfortunately, there's no polite way to make them stop, but if you're both drunk enough you can just walk away and hopefully they won't follow.

A Guide To Your Future Divorce

Of my friends who have made good livings over the years, I'm probably the most financially secure. I've invested well. But more importantly, I've never been married. Unlike so many of my peers, I've never been "halved" in a marital dissolution. But this doesn't mean I don't have experience with the topic. It seems that now, in my forties, I'm witnessing as many of my buddies grinding through tough breakups as I watched strippers grind on those same guys during perfunctory lap dances at bachelor parties in our twenties and thirties. Most of these friends look to me for advice, and I do my best to offer it. But I've realized that I could be a better friend-and satisfy my own curiosity-if I sought out answers from an expert. So I recently sat down with a prominent divorce attorney who's represented high-profile clients in the Los Angeles area for more than 40 years. Rick (not his real name) walked me through many lessons that can be learned from the drama and pain he encounters daily.

IF A MAN IS GETTING MARRIED, WHAT SHOULD HE BE THINKING ABOUT?

The first thing is how compatible their value systems are. The second thing is, what does he have to protect and would a premarital agreement work for them? In a premarital agreement, we can figure out the 'what if' and how it would work.

If you want to cap spousal support at a certain amount because your career has already been built up, you can do that. Let's say you take a ball player who has a 10 million contract, and he got that contract because of his years of training and playing. That career has to be protected financially from the standpoint of earning power. Sponsorship income can be carved out, because that's really for past services. If you have a career that precedes the marriage, you could be contributing your separate-property career to a community-property bank account, and that's not something you necessarily want to do.

"There is no contract that has been rewritten by the courts more than premarital agreements."

WHAT IF A GUY HAS A SMALL BUSINESS, AND HIS SPOUSE DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING?

The person would want to protect that asset. If there were a prenup, his interest in the business could remain separate, but the salary he takes out of the business can be community property. So, if the business is sold down-the-line, that doesn't become community property, including the increased value of the business. You'll have a valuation of assets that were acquired before marriage and it will be disclosed and there will be wording that protects separate property.

CAN PEOPLE GET AROUND A PRENUP DURING A DIVORCE?

A judge can throw out a premarital agreement if it is "unfair" at the time of enforcement; or, if the disclosures were not correct; or, if it were instituted under duress; or, if one person lacked capacity when they entered the agreement. Let's say the woman had six children at the time of enforcement, but the premarital agreement had a waiver of spousal support. I think a judge could throw out that waiver. There is no contract that has been rewritten by the courts more than premarital agreements.

THIS MAKES ME WONDER WHAT I SHOULD DO IF I WERE GOING TO LIVE WITH SOMEONE, AS I HAVE IN THE PAST AND COULD CONCEIVABLY DO AGAIN. SHOULD I HAVE SOMETHING IN WRITING WITH THEM?

I think that's very important but many people can't get themselves to propose that type of an agreement because they are saying to the person they want to live with, "Let's live together to see how we get along," without any promises.

"Anyone can sue for anything. There's always someone out there who's going to take the case. You're really better off having an agreement."

WHAT COULD HAPPEN IF I DIDN'T HAVE A PRE-COHABITATION AGREEMENT, OR WHATEVER IT'S CALLED?

If she gets sick, you're putting yourself in jeopardy because she's not working; or if she lost her job and you're taking care of her. Those are the kinds of things that can be very harmful, economically. She could have potential rights of a quasi-contractual relationship, based on promises and how you held yourself out to the public. If there were letters at Valentine's Day or Christmas or birthdays, saying "I'll always care for you and I will love you forever" and you were providing her with important things like cars or anything that puts you together contractually; then chances are you would be approached to give her money to get reestablished. It's a risk issue. Anyone can sue for anything. There's always someone out there who is going to take her case. It's the cost of a potential loss and the cost of legal fees. So you're better off settling. You're really better off having an agreement."

IF SOMEONE WANTS OUT OF HIS MARRIAGE, WHAT SHOULD HE DO?

He should see a divorce lawyer, right away. The first thing we would do is create a binder of all assets and liabilities and all income and the sources of the assets, whether they were separate or community; whether or not there was deferred income, so we would get an understanding of what child support would be and what spousal support would be. Child support is pretty easy, because there's a computer program that tells you what a judge is going to be looking at. With no children, it's usually easier, especially if it's a longer-term marriage, say 12 years [shorter marriages usually pay support for a set amount of time; if it's longer term, it can go on indefinitely].

IF A MAN IS LEAVING HIS WIFE FOR SOMEONE ELSE, DOES THAT CHANGE ANYTHING?

It will change the anger level. It will not change the law. However, if he has given community property to that person, that community property can be clawed back.

SHOULD A MAN TELL HIS WIFE THAT HE'S LEAVING HER FOR SOMEONE ELSE?

I would wait to determine whether or not it was necessary to tell her. But I wouldn't lie to her if she said, "I know there was someone else in your life." I would be very careful about how I would respond to those questions. He should keep things as calm as possible and not aggravate the situation.

"In my 38-year-marriage, I've learned what not to do."

IN ADDITION TO WANTING TO LESSEN THE AGGRAVATION, A BIG CONCERN FOR MOST ENTERING A DIVORCE PROCESS IS LIMITING THEIR LEGAL BILLS. WHAT ADVICE COULD YOU GIVE SOMEONE ON HOW THEY CAN KEEP THEIR COSTS DOWN?

By being organized. They have to fill out a form of their expenses, and the lawyer needs to back it up. I have had people show up with a grocery bag full of receipts and expected me to figure it out. That just costs a lot of money to unravel. And secondly, by being in communication with your attorney and not being an absent client. It's impossible to represent an empty chair.

MANY OF MY FRIENDS HAVE COMPLAINED ABOUT THEIR DIVORCE ATTORNEYS. WHAT ARE THE SIGNS THAT YOU AREN'T BEING REPRESENTED WELL?

How well your attorney listens to you is number one. I've seen lawyers take conference calls while with a client or multitask: Write emails, text, et cetera. It's very obvious when they have their mind on other things instead of being there for a client. If the attorney is too busy to put the time into their case, then it is time to leave. And it is better to leave sooner than later. Also, many lawyers love to write self-serving inflammatory letters [to the other side]. They do it for control and to create situations that will generate more fees. There are people out there who are just nasty, and they think that's how the game should be played.

WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED AS A DIVORCE ATTORNEY THAT YOU'VE BROUGHT INTO YOUR 38-YEAR MARRIAGE?

Well, I've learned what not to do. If you can get the point across that I'm not right, necessarily, and you're not right, necessarily, then we can discuss things and get to the middle and try and work things out so it's not a burr-under-the-saddle kind of situation. Some of the smallest things can be blown out of proportion and make things uncomfortable.

That is the best guidance Rick gave me. Maybe if more people could simply do a little more to not let marital problems explode, they wouldn't have to go through all of this costly unpleasantness. Still, I think I'll take a wide berth of it all and remain unmarried.

"Follow Gavin Polone on Twitter: @gavinpolone"

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